The Tuesday Elections a GOP LOSS!!!!

So it seems that on Tuesday November 3rd there were some elections that have been described as a railroading of democrats. I literally just heard Wolf Blitzer suggest that the Democrats were hurt badly today by some Republobots winning election. So here is a little run down, and perhaps a reassessment of the tuesdays results. First New Jersey elected a Republican Governer so GOP 1 DNC 0. Virginia elects a Republican Governor ok, GOP 2- DNC 0. Wow the republicans are really whooping the Democrats ass, they won 2 governors races, one in a state that is the douche cousin of New York, and the other is the safe suburb of Washington D.C. and the Slightly more successful twin of backwoods toolish West Virginia. What will the DNC ever do...oh I know win a congressional seat. New York's 23rd congressional district elects a democrat, meaning that the democrats have that pesky control of congress...oh darn what will the democrats do, I know pass smart legislation that has the best interest of the country, not just the religious right who can't tell their ass from their head. Maybe the GOP should stop Sarah Palin from endorsing anyone she is a bit like herpes, won't go away and just ruins your day. GOP 2-DNC 1. Next we have the democrat hold in California's 10th district uh oh GOP 2- DNC 2. Then there is Detroit elected Democrat Dave Bing. GOP 2- DNC 3. Then some city named St. Petersburg elected a republican so GOP 3- DNC 3. Michael Bloomburg won reelection in New York giving the independents a win. So lets review the republicans gain no seats in congress, the democrats increase their majority control, the republicans win two douchie governor races, and we tie in mayoral elections. How is this a republican victory. I think we have another case of tools in journalism and politics. It seems to me that the DNC are the ones who really won on Tuesday. Please remember Don't Be A Tool!!!

Guess what its time for our first ever award, TOOL OF THE WEEK! And you guessed it Repbulican Representative Joe Wilson is the winner. Thank you Joe for showing your tooliness, next time try throwing a shoe. Just like Pelosi said its time to move along now.
"Don't Be A Tool"
Kyle

Town Hall Meetings

Town Hall Meetings- when did this idiotic idea start, I can't remember was it McCain? Please stop its such a waste of time. The last thing we need to do is give a forum for people who can't find the hole in their own ass to talk about politics.  I know it sounded like a good idea. I bet the meeting where this little idea began went something like this.

 Tool #1: "Hey Do you think there is a way we could give a bunch of tools that live in this country a chance to talk to their government?"

Tool #2: "I have an idea let's herd them into a room and talk about subjects they have no hope of understanding and let camera's videotape them."

Tool #1: "Oh my god, that's brilliant."

Tool #2:  "I know right, its almost like Rush Limbaugh is channeling his douchiness right to me."

"Don't Be A Tool"

Kyle

Ah The Bailout!!

I think I will start this post by reminding those of you who would like to blame our current President for this little recession we've found ourselves...IT STARTED WHEN BUSH WAS IN OFFICE!!! AND BUSH PUSHED THROUGH CONGRESS THE MONEY TO BAILOUT THE BANKS!!! Now that said, I read an article in my beloved New York Times the other day that highlights an issue I have when people debate the money used to bailout our precious banking system. The article, "As the Biggest Banks Repay Their Bailout Money, the Government Sees a Profit", is a positive one discussing the profits are government has earned from investments in several large banks, "profits totaling around 4 billion dollars". However, several times throughout the article Zachery Kouwe (journalist) intimates that the money our government used to bailout these banks is some how "taxpayers" money.  Well its time for a checkup bis-nitch, it is not "taxpayer" money. For the sake of an economics debate I'll say it was taxpayer money, then we paid our taxes and it became the governments money.  So the government in reality used its money to finance the bailout.  Had it been "taxpayer" money than shouldn't the "taxpayers" have become shareholders of these banks which would give us access to shareholder meetings.  Last time I checked I hadn't been invited to a shareholder meeting.  So I say Don't Be A Tool. 

I get it... Republicans and Democrats alike need to politicize the bailout in an effort to gain re-election.  But I think journalist from across the country should know better than to report information like this, its how false realities are created, and its certainly where red-necks and blue-necks alike get ammunition to piss and moan about government spending in "Town Hall Meetings". 

I know journalists need quotes for their articles but apparently the best they could do was Congressman Jeb Hensarling (A Tool I'm Sure) who in reference to the government being repaid the bailout money and ending the idea of government banking says this: " The Taxpayers want their money back and they want the government out of our banking system." Jeb, Jeb, Jeb, the taxpayers have no idea want they want, its not their money, our government is already involved in the banking system (FDIC, Treasury Dept., that guy Bernanke at the Federal Reserve) and YOU SIR ARE A TOOL.  I mean Holy Crap this is the caliber of jackass people keep electing to congress. Think before you speak, and for god's sake think before you write an article for the New York Times, its not like your a journalist for Fox News. And Remember Don't Be A Tool.

Kyle

It's Official

It's official, people are tools. This post will be short and sweet. In no way is President Obama and the american government similiar to Hitler and Nazi Germany. Not only is this an incorrect assesment of our government, but it is horribly unethical to call our President Hitler. Besides Universal Health Care is in no way relatable to the Nazi's. I think Jon Stewart said it best when he joked that "People often overlook the German health care policies of the 1930's". It wasn't even okay to call G-Golly Bush Hitler. But for those of you who enjoy doing so, I will say this...DON'T BE A TOOL.

Health Care

Universal Health Care seems to be a touchy issue for many people.  So my question is this. WHY? Its not rocket science people, yes the government has a bad habit of ruining legislation by bastardizing its true intent. (I'll refrain from using the term pork barreling). But still Universal Health Care is not Rocket Science.  

Yes I agree with our President, so you can all start calling me a socialist, but I warn you by doing so you are in fact carving the word tool on your forehead.  Our government is not a socialist government, they aren't interested in creating a socialist government. Obama isn't a socialist. The Health Care Plan is not socialism. Universal Health Care is simple I have it narrowed down to four easy to read points: (These points for those of you who are smart enough to get it, barely scratches this topics cover)

1. If you don't have health care the government will offer a plan that is far better than medicare. 

2. If you pay way to much for your health care and get shitty coverage as a result you can switch to the government plan.  

(My wife's insurance plan required that she pay the first 1500$ of expenses out of pocket and then they will cover everything.  However, She nor I have 1500$)

3. By doing so the government can supply those without health care, "care", thereby reducing the cost of emergency coverage, and lowering healthcare debt and strain on emergency rooms. 

4.  Private Health insurance agencies will be forced to offer better coverage at lower prices with out as many rules/regulations for what they will and won't cover. Thereby helping millions of americans.

This is all that government wants to do, help people.  And I get it news agency get good ratings when they show video of some dumb redneck spewing nonsense about burdening our children with debt and that the government is trying to invade their life.  But these people are tools. None of them have a first grade education on understanding the economy, or national debt, or how the government actually works....hell most senators couldn't find their own head in their ass.  But think for one minute the government isn't interested in you! they don't care about your personal finances, or whether or not you like your health coverage. They just want to help those that need helping. The Economic debate about the cost of government health care is so large that a 20 second sound bite, or some moron senator talking about a retarded idea such as Co-op Health care won't even begin to help the public understand the benefits of universal health care. 

I'm sorry but if you believe that there would ever have been roaming death squads killing old people then you are a TOOL! Maybe a bigger tool than Glenn Beck or Sarah Palin could ever hope to be. But I'll save those two for another post.  

Think before you speak.  No president or congressperson or idiot mayor would ever suggest that kind of thing.  Their career would be over so fast its not even funny.  The roaming death squads are a ploy.  Its an attempt to anger rednecks into showing up at town hall meetings and yelling. Apparently it worked, thanks for that.  If you want to be a good citizen I applaude you, but for the love of god, whomever that might be, think for one fucking minute about what is really going on, and the difference between fiction and reality. Its called common sense. I am imagine that Orwell and Lenin are rolling over in their graves with laughter at how stupid you people are.  

 DON"T BE A TOOL!

Don't Be A Tool-"A New Blog"

Welcome to my new blog! After many long a thoroughly frustrating conversations with friends, and complete strangers, I have decided it is time to speak out.  My wife thought it would be a good idea to start this blog in an effort to stop mass hysteria and the general toolery that has seemed to engulf politics, business and news of the day. So For my first post let me say this. STOP BEING A TOOL! 

Over the course of time I hope that many of you will stop your jackassary and think before you speak. For those of you who questions whom this blog is directed at, all of you! Politicians, Journalists, News(persons-this is for the feminists) and of course the most important demographic "tools".